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DIY: Haircut

07.01.07 - 07:00pm

I’m a very do it yourself type of guy. Luckily I happen to be rather blessed with a rather sharp mechanical aptitude but in some other fields such as creative design and art I utterly fail. Cutting hair can often be regarded as an art form or an advanced form of trimming hedges, I myself happen to view it as the second option especially when it’s me wielding the garden sheers scissors. I had been saying for a few days I was going to shave my hair off completely, actually it’s been a few years that I’ve been saying that. I have very curly hair, so curly to the point that it’ll literally break hair gel if I attempt to claim control over my hair. It does it’s own thing, I do my own thing, and so long as everything goes smoothly it and I have a loving relationship. Last night I decided to mix it up a bit with a midnight raid against my hair and lets say it probably got the last laugh out of this. Enough talking though, here is how you go about cutting your hair, Chris Morrell style.

Materials

Knowing full well that I was about to perform a massacre upon my hair, I had to prepare myself. I highly suggest taking a picture before you get to chopping. Otherwise all you need is a sharp implement that’ll cut through hair, hopefully with ease. I chose the pair of scissors that I use to strip insulation off of wires and cut insulation in the garage. Yes, I was asking for trouble. To assist those scissors I decided to use my Fusion razer as the scissors were only able to trim the hair down to about 1 cm in length before it got a bit risky for my scalp. Depending on the styling you are going for you may also want a comb and some hair gel, I opted out of the comb as I’m on a strict no-comb diet.

Methods

There are multiple ways you can go about cutting your hair. I myself went for the “grab a handful and saw through it with scissors” approach however I’d highly suggest going with the more precise “gently cut through small portions of hair at a time” style. My brute force approach resulted in a few patches of hair being cut that I didn’t want cut, perhaps those patches build character?

A mirror isn’t necessary however I highly suggest a mirror or two, especially when cutting the backside. I find that manipulating scissors while guiding your hand from the reflection of one mirror off another off your head can be very very dangerous, I damn near cut off an ear as I thought left was right and moved my hand and cut at the same time. Just like all skilled techniques I suggest a few practice cuts so you get used to the awkward cutting motions. I also found using a digital camera to view your side profile to be rather helpful, some hair styles can really suffer badly from a terrible side profile.

Results

I was impressed with my haircut, this being my first time and all. Imagine when you made your first paper airplane and it flew 30 feet, well if my haircut was a paper airplane then it just flew a quarter mile and looped back and landed at my feet. I had to accept a few loses in the process though, there is a chunk missing out of the back of my head, I’m just going to say it’s a scar, chicks dig scars. Speaking of scars and dismemberment, if you do happen to cut an ear off or cut into your scalp I suggest getting some ice and a mop as it’ll bleed quite a bit. If you are especially afraid of nicking/slashing yourself then I suggest using safety scissors your first couple of times. After all was said and done I showered off my head to get rid of the loose hairs, applied some gel, and voila I had a masterpiece.

Conclusion

Honestly this was me just having a bit of fun, I have about a month to grow back my hair and judging from how fast my back hair grows(just kidding) I shouldn’t have any problems, hell I’ll probably shave it off again in a week. All in all this cost me about an hour of my time and theoretically saved me $15 so long as I’m not forced to go to a barber to have my hair fixed. I’m almost positive that nobody else would be willing to chop and mangle their hair but if you do feel inspired by this please link back or atleast contact me. Stick it to the man/barber and chop your own hair! Next up, surgery for gunshot wounds including a how-to on acquiring a gunshot wound!

Observations

I wrote this article immediately after chopping my hair however it took me a while to re-size the images so I’ve had time to make a few observations in regards to my particular styling. I went out for Paul Stamatiou’s birthday Saturday night and a few people said “cool hair”. Had a little kid with a baby mohawk give me a high five and had someone said they missed their mohawk when they saw me. Sunday I had a girl while jogging run past saying “nice hair” and some dude in a truck driving through campus gave me a thumbs up. I find all these instances hilarious as the only thing that stands out is the hair. I also went to church in a rather impromptu fashion, I was walking by and realized there was a service in about 20 minutes, so I walked in, talked to the priest and he didn’t seem to have a problem, so the last step will be seeing what my boss thinks tomorrow ;)

Category: Articles, DIY, Haircut, Personal